Have you ever gone over an issue with your coach or therapist, only to have the pain or the pattern resurface later on from a different trigger?
How did you feel?
If you were anything like most people I talk to, you felt frustrated and disappointed.
Frustrated because you thought you had 'dealt with that already' and disappointed because you now realize it hasn't actually been eradicated.
Today I want to give you some clarity on this.
I've heard many clients say that they were advised that the deep work to uncover the pattern was 'the hardest part'.
This is meant in the moment to encourage and reassure them, but all it really does is confuse 'the work' with what I call 'the theatrics' of coaching 😉
The initial breakthrough is an event, for sure. It's amazing to be able to see your whole life as one big and nuanced, clear and predictable response. It feels euphoric to suddenly realize that the world is (and has always been) responding to your commands and that everything you want to have, be and do is now possible and available.
BUT... that's not actually 'the work'.
The door is now open, but you haven't yet walked through it.
Neural repatterning requires that you make different choices throughout your day.
The only way to make real change is to create and cement new neural pathways, and that's done by coming off autopilot and choosing in alignment with the new identity and the desired outcome.
And that takes support. Because it can be difficult, uncomfortable, and occasionally scary in the moment.
The breakthrough isn't the work - the breakthrough is the key that opens the door to your work.
So if you did a couple of sessions with a coach that one time, and you felt like you got amazing clarity but didn't stay with the longer term accountability and support required to actually cement the changes, I want you to put 2 and 2 together on this right now...
The value is not in the moment of clarity... the value is in what you do with it, now that you're able to make conscious choices rather than being run by the subconscious programs...
(Incidentally, this is why coaches don't work by session - we work by package. Because the breakthrough is the first part, but the support through the repatterning process is the kicker.)
If the pattern is coming up for you, that means that the original neural pathway is still active.
If it's still active, still the default setting, then 2 things aren't complete yet:
- the new pathway hasn't been created / cemented.
- the old pathway is still being used, and therefore hasn't pruned apart.
Achieving that requires conscious, consistent, committed decisions in the direction of your dreams.
And that can't be done on your own. That needs support, oversight, strategy, accountability, and a container that ensures you never let it fall by the wayside.
If you're ready for that...
S'what I do 😎
Forever in your corner,